Friday, June 25, 2010

Gary and Tony Have a Baby represents heart ache and tragedy

Last night I watched Gary and Tony Have a Baby. It was produced by Soledad O'Brien, in a very biased light to make it look all positive. Despite this effort, some real tragedies emerged.

Gary and Tony are gay men who decide they have a right to have a baby. They go to great lengths to accomplish this and do it in a rather roundabout way. They didn't want to just impregnate a woman, so they took the ovum from one woman, fertilized it with the sperm of one of the men, then implanted it in a separate woman.

One of the saddest parts was the surrogate mother. Of course, they paid her thousands of dollars to use her body in that way. They said they didn't want to just impregnate a woman because they thought she would develop a stronger attachment to the child. That's why they got a separate woman to donate an ovum. Anyway, of course, the surrogate did in fact develop a strong attachment to the child she carried for 8 or 9 months. She said she has little contact with him now, and she thinks about him every day. She said if she doesn't keep herself busy, she could easily become depressed.

She also worried that these two men do not have the maternal instinct. For example, they paraded their baby at a gay rights rally to say they want this kind of thing to be acceptable. The mother (or surrogate) felt they were putting that poor baby at risk because those things can become hostile. And she's right. Men simply do not possess the maternal instinct. they are not mothers and never can be. It's a terrible tragedy when a baby is taken from his mother who he will never know.

I could count about 8-9 immoral acts which occurred for all of this to happen. Every child has a right to know his mother and father. Sometimes that doesn't happen due to tragic circumstances, but we shouldn't normalize a tragedy and pretend it's just as acceptable. This child will never know his mother's love, he will never experience it. Of course, he'll never breastfeed, etc. An entire aspect of his development is missing.

Of course, there are many other moral issues involved. To me, it seemed this baby just represented these two guys' sense of entitlement. "We are gay. We have rights. We can do anything anyone else can and no one can stop us." They want a baby as an accessory or to prove gay people can be parents. This is not a political statement, this is a child.

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